1. **Thread 1: 12 dos and don’ts**
What do most 8 and 9-figure startups have in common? Great company culture.
And a key part of their culture? Employee recognition.
5 Dos and 6 Don’ts of employee recognition:
After business model & timing PEOPLE are the most important thing in your business.
The #1 thing that today’s top talent wants & expects?
To be SEEN & to do meaningful work.
Here are 6 Dos and 6 Don'ts when it comes to managers recognizing their team.
Don’t Rate High on Empathy? That’s OK
If you don’t naturally like to recognize others…
You can try to change but it’s likely easier to hire the right people around you.
The key is that your MANAGERS recognize understand & care for their teams deeply.
Hire for empathy.
Customize Your Recognition.
Some people appreciate recognition in a hall of 150 people whereas others want to be appreciated one-on-one.
• Don’t assume what they want
• Ask how they want to be recognized (in public in writing etc…)
• Managers align with their preferences
Managers gotta’ get personal.
Treat the individual when connecting 1:1.
Forced Moments Of Recognition
In the turbulent startup world it can be hard to prioritize recognition.
This is why I:
• Block time on my calendar for appreciation
• Send physical thank you cards
• Host monthly gratitude/recognition calls as a Co
• Get my team to keep me accountable or fill in for my gaps
Although not obvious pausing to celebrate your people is positive ROI.
Be Specific
When appreciating someone be specific.
Why are you recognizing them?
What specifically did they do that deserves your praise?
This does 2 things:
1. Makes them aware of what they’re doing well so they can do it again
2. Makes it come off as more authentic & meaningful
Bonus points if you can recognize people around company values.
Write Thank You Cards.
Thank you cards communicate effort.
It tells them that you’ve made the effort to:
• Stop your day & focus on them & their note
• Write a personal message inside it
• Post it to their address
I’ve found this is the most potent form of recognition.
And you can have your EA drive all of it (except the writing).
Recognize People At All Levels Of The Org
At times an intern deserves the same appreciation as a VP.
When recognition is institutionalized at your company the effect is compounding.
When managers ensure that everyone feels seen…
And positive impact is continuously rewarded with respect & kudos…
Proactive self-driven productivity skyrockets.
Now here are the don’ts:
Don’t Equate Recognition To Coddling
Everyone esp. the younger gen wants to be seen.
It allows them to associate greater meaning with their work.
Which increases their drive & effort.
But don’t spoil them with fake compliments.
Or recognize mediocrity.
Doing so will backfire.
This is about honesty & rewarding the right people the right way.
Don’t Recognize For Results Only
There isn’t ALWAYS a direct relationship between results & efforts.
I used to only appreciate my sales VPs when we hit sales targets.
But something was missing.
I now appreciate results & efforts as the latter is fully in their control.
If I see someone genuinely give it their all w/ integrity they deserve to be seen.
Don’t Be Inauthentic With Your Recognition
We all know what fake recognition feels like.
And all it does is:
• Lead to lost trust
• Spread feelings of “blah” across the org
• Is received as an insult
Dig deep to find an authentic compliment.
If you can’t come up with anything don’t say anything.
No recognition > Inauthentic recognition.
Don’t Push Away Recognition.
True leaders don't seek accolades.
However when appreciation finds you:
• Accept it
• Say thank you
• Loop in others that deserve the praise too
Remember recognition isn't just about you—it's an acknowledgment of collective efforts.
The more people that can be brought into the praise (if authentic) the better.
Don’t Recognize People Only When They Agree With You
True leaders aren’t obsessed with being right or having their way.
They’re laser-focused on what’s best for the organization.
I love this Bezos quote:
"I don't agree but I'm committed."
A testament to valuing collective progress over personal opinions.
Don’t Forget To Recognize Yourself.
It does not mean flattering yourself.
Instead acknowledge your wins.
Tell yourself:
• I am valuable
• I work hard with good intentions
• I am good enough
You can’t appreciate others if you don’t first appreciate yourself.
I appreciate the effort you put into reading this!
If you enjoyed this thread:
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2. Recognize my efforts by sharing this thread with your audience
2. **Thread 2: What to do if you’re going through hell**
During the pandemic my $100M business got clobbered by the pandemic my wife lost her high-paying executive job we experienced a miscarriage and multiple failed IVF transfers and an immediate family member was dealing with a severe health crisis that required all-hands on deck.
Overcoming these challenges was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
Here’s the playbook to bounce back from hell every single time without fail:
Massive Action Orientation
As each problem hit me in the face I kept asking:
“What is the next best move I can make?”
I could have buried my face in a pillow and cried.
But that is NOT what gets you through tough times.
Focus on actions not reactions.
Action > Wallowing
Shared My Pain
During this time I met every month with a CEO group.
I talked about the key challenges I faced in business AND my personal life.
Having this support & being able to vent my frustration was crucial to getting out of this slump.
It made me realize how underrated community is as a CEO.
Always have people you can share your pain/problems with.
It’s often the first step to healing.
Asked For Help
I’ve always been bad at asking for help & instead try & figure out everything by myself.
This is a terrible approach.
No effective leader is a lone wolf.
So I talked with my friends & mentors who had been through similar problems.
I took inspiration from what worked for them.
When rock bottom hits get support from others.
Long Term Outlook
Deep down I knew that:
• My wife Shannon and I WOULD figure out our business/career challenges
• We WOULD eventually have kids (still working on it)
• My family member COULD very likely get healthy again
When s*&t hits the fan ACT intensely in the present…
But set your vision far down the road.
Cut Back on Alcohol
When things get tough alcohol and drugs are the easiest escape.
But this just delays (and amplifies) the feelings you’re escaping when the effects wear off.
So I limited booze to weekends only.
And now I barely drink.
I sleep better feel better and have greater clarity.
Use alcohol to celebrate happiness not escape pain.
Elevated My Sleep
When charging through hell sleep is pivotal.
But it’s also often the hardest thing to do.
Here's how I elevated:
• Took sleep supplements (Lifeforce Magnesium Cortisol Manager by IT sleepy tea)
• Did fear journaling before bed & when I woke up at 2 am (What’s the worst that can happen?
What’s my specific action plan?)
• No screens 1 hour before eating or alcohol (3 hours before) bed
Daily AM Workouts
You must find avenues to get negative energy out of your system in hard times.
For me this avenue was strength training.
• I put on 25 lbs of muscle
• Released my anger at the gym
• Gave myself something to focus on that I could 100% control
Naval said it best: The gym truly is a temple.
Learned the Skill of Acceptance
I thought acceptance was for the weak.
Now I know it's the #1 weapon in a successful man's arsenal.
Acceptance is making your peace with the past.
It's telling yourself the right story.
So you can create the future you desire.
Accepting your situation as being meant for you is the first step to getting yourself out of it.
I Saw My Challenges as Opportunities
Anyone can stay positive when everything’s going well.
Only the best leaders maintain positivity when things go sideways.
The most positive reframe: see every challenge as a growth opportunity (Carol Dweck talks
about this in Mindset).
Our primary purpose in life is to solve problems.
Learn to crave & appreciate them.
Developed Active Listening
Whenever my wife would tell me a problem my impulse was to search for a solution.
What I failed to understand was she often just wanted me to listen.
Now I try to ask:
"Would you like my help solving this or do you want me to listen?"
Sometimes all someone needs is to be heard not advice.
These are my top 10 takeaways from the most challenging time of my life.
If you enjoyed this thread:
1. Follow me @seanpk for more actionable advice.
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3. **Thread 3: 7 tips from the world’s best speakers**
People fear public speaking more than they do death.
7 public speaking tips from the world's best speakers:
Focus on Your Audience Not Yourself
"It's not about you people are really not thinking about you. Like usual they're thinking about
themselves." - Oprah Winfrey
When speaking don't think about yourself.
Think about your audience and providing maximum value to them.
If you're worried about you you’ve already lost.
Focus #1 = Tone & Body Language
"Words mean little when the tone of voice is sharp." - Maya Angelou
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Maya Angelou knew words alone weren’t enough. Your tone and body language matter more.
• Vary your tone
• Use hand gestures to emphasize points
• Make eye contact with your audience
People will remember how you made them feel not what you said.
Empathize With Them
Before you speak to an audience ask:
• What is their biggest challenge?
• How can my knowledge offer a solution?
Martin Luther King Jr's words still live with us.
Why? Because his passion ignited change.
In his final speech he declared: "I may not get there with you. But we as a people will get to the
promised land."
His passion united people for a common cause.
Show Your Passion
In 1933 the US was in an economic depression.
Roosevelt addressed the nation:
“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”
Before you speak develop an undying passion for your message.
Inspire your audience.
People will feel your words only when you do.
Leverage Storytelling
"During my lifetime I have dedicated myself to this struggle of the African people. I have fought
against white domination and I have fought against black domination."- Nelson Mandela.
From him we learn:
• Personal stories give powerful context
• Relate struggles to broader human experiences
• Position yourself within the story for authenticity
Your audience will remember the tales that resonate deep within.
Educate your Audience
Your audience is there to learn something not just to be moved.
End your speech with at least 1 or 2 takeaways the audience can walk away with.
Steve Jobs in his Stanford commencement speech shared the significance of connecting the
dots love and loss and the inevitability of death as a motivator for life.
Malala Yousafzai in her speech at the United Nations called for worldwide access to education
emphasizing that one child one teacher one book and one pen can change the world.
Make your words echo in their memory.
Make Conversation
What made Steve Jobs so good at speaking? His conversational tone.
He didn’t talk at people.
He talked WITH them.
How to talk with people?
• Use pronouns
• Don't read from a paper or PowerPoint slide
• Make eye contact w/ individuals in your audience
Note: When you connect w/ one person eye-to-eye many others will feel the same connection.
Have conversations not presentations.
Surprise Them
In his iconic speech Winston Churchill promised "blood toil tears and sweat."
The unexpected intensity of his words gripped the nation.
By breaking expectations you captivate attention.
Like Churchill's unforgettable rhetoric surprise your audience and capture their attention.
Humor
"I got my name from my father. And I got my accent from my mother."
Learning from Obama:
• Playfully address the elephant in the room
• Use humor to diffuse tension or scrutiny
• Engage with self-deprecation to humanize yourself
Laughter bridges gaps and builds rapport.
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